Creative Control

Miscellaneous Mental Musings of an Emerging Artist

Thrown from the horse. Still contemplating a return to the saddle.

I flaked.

It is Monday morning, two days after my second grab at the brass ring that is casting in Too Much Light, and I’m expecting only two of the following outcomes:

1) I am being phoned to hear that I have not been called back.
2) I am not being phoned at all.

I harbor no ill will, mind you; my piece went pretty bad. Not terrible, but it had a lot of room for improvement. When I say I flaked, however, I don’t mean just at the audition itself, I had clearly flaked several times beforehand, especially last week. I did not even use the piece I expected to use last Thursday, since Friday morning I wrote something I felt was better, and since Friday evening, when I rehearsed the other piece, it didn’t work technically. So essentially, I approached my audition with a piece that was barely 24 hours old. I performed it as best I could, got a few laughs, but by and large, was unimpressive.

Hm. Y’know, I don’t want to talk about the rest of my weekend after that for right now. Suffice to say that afterwards I was feeling so spiritually miserable that I made several decisions that were leaning towards self-destruction.

Current music: Soul Coughing, “Irresistible Bliss”

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This entry was posted on March 4, 2002 by in Life, Neo-Futurists, Theatre.
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